If Success Was Designed Around the Woman You Are Today, What Would Change?
- thespiralcoaching
- Jul 20
- 3 min read
Updated: Aug 8
Over the past few weeks, I've been asking women one simple question:
If success was designed around the woman you are today, what would change?
I expected a few thoughtful replies. However, I didn't anticipate the depth of the conversations that followed.
Busy, successful, high-achieving women shared thoughts they hadn’t voiced in a long time.
Common Themes in Our Conversations
Here are just a few of the themes that emerged:
✔ Spending more time with family without feeling guilty.
✔ Measuring success less by titles and more by alignment.
✔ Realising they had quietly believed that if something came easily, it somehow didn't count as success.
✔ No longer wanting to spend life chasing the next milestone.
✔ Wanting to feel genuinely valued instead of simply being expected to carry more.
✔ Feeling they always had to be "the strong one", even when they were exhausted.
What struck me wasn't the variety of their answers. It was what was missing.
Not one woman mentioned earning more money. Not one talked about a bigger title. Almost every answer pointed towards the same thing.
They weren't describing bigger success.
They were describing a different relationship with success.
One where ambition and wellbeing could coexist. One where achievement no longer came at the expense of themselves.
The Importance of Identity
This is why identity matters so much. The woman who built your success isn't necessarily the woman living it today.
You grow. Your priorities change. What once felt important may no longer fit. Yet, it's surprisingly easy to keep living by a definition of success you created years ago, simply because you've never stopped to question it.
The real question isn't whether your definition of success has changed.
It's how much longer you're prepared to keep living by one that no longer fits.
Every year you continue chasing a version of success that no longer reflects who you are is another year spent feeling disconnected from the life you've worked so hard to build.
Reconnecting with Yourself
That's exactly where my work begins. Together, we uncover the identity patterns quietly shaping the way you think, work, perform, give, and make decisions.
From there, we build greater clarity, stronger self-trust, and create a version of success that no longer asks you to sacrifice yourself in order to sustain it.
Imagine...
Making decisions without constantly second-guessing yourself.
Feeling successful without constantly needing to prove yourself.
Being ambitious without feeling guilty.
Creating success that feels just as good on the inside as it looks on the outside.
If this has stirred something in you, don't ignore it.
Once you see it, it's very difficult to unsee it.
Clients who complete my 10-week Success That Includes You programme often tell me they wish they'd started sooner because, for the first time in years, they stopped trying to fit themselves into their success... and started creating success that truly fit them.
So I'll leave you with the same question:
If success was designed around the woman you are today, what would change?
Ready to Explore What's Possible?
Book your complimentary Success That Includes You Session
A relaxed, no-obligation conversation to explore where you are, what feels out of alignment, and what creating success that truly includes you could look like.
Here's to creating a version of success that includes you.
Senem 🌀
About The Spiral Coaching
The Spiral Coaching Ltd is led by Senem Palaz, an ICF-trained identity coach with over 20 years’ experience supporting more than 700 people through life transitions.
The work centres on helping women recognise patterns of self-abandonment, avoid burnout, and build a life that includes them.
All coaching is private, one-to-one, fully online, and confidential.
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